Allan: "Hey, you're wearing a chime shirt so I can bug you" me: "Really?" Allan: "Yeah! Hey can you disconnect this user for me?" me: "No." Allan: "Yes you can. I've got authorisation to get it done" me: "No, I can't." Allan: "I've got authorisation from Sean to get it done. So please do it" me: "But I can't do it. Besides, have you lodged it as a fault?" Allan: "No, but I've got autho.." me: "No, Sean can't do that." Allan: "But he has. So can you do it or no?" geez, the learning curve on these people is do flat you can go bowling on it me: "No, I can't. I don't have access to those systems. You need to speak to either the networks team, or ITS. And even then, you will need to lodge it as a fault." Allan: "But you're Chime! You can deal with it!" me: "No, I'm in Chime Services. You want Chime Networks or ITS." Allan: "So who in networks do I need to speak to?" me: "I don't know. But regardless, you will need to lodge a fault. That's the procedure. You have to follow procedure." Allan: "But I've got authorisation to get this done now!" me: "Sean can authorise anything he wants, but he works in Retail. He doesn't have the authority to change our procedures over here in Chime. The procedure in Chime, which you guys have to follow, is that you lodge a fault." Allan: "But I need this guy disconnected like NOW!" me: "Yes, and if you lodge a fault, it will get done. very quickly." Allan: "But when? I need it done like now!" me: "Like as soon as they've got it. That's why we have these procedures" Allan: "So if I lodge a fault, I can get this guy disconnected?" me: "Yes." Allan: "Like, straight away?" me: "Yes." Allan: "In 5 minutes?" me: "Yes." Allan: "Okay. I'll lodge a fault. I reckon it sucks how you can't do it." me: "Go lodge that fault." Wow, that was hard. But wait, there's more! James: "Hey Chris, do you know how to disconnect adsl accounts?" me: "Is that regarding <insert username here>?" James: "Yes." me: "Do any of your systems deal with disconnecting accounts?" James: "I suppose so. I don't really know" I should point out that this is okay, he's new, so doesn't know much about the systems about the place. me: "Okay, I suggest you find out. If you don't, then get them to lodge the fault with the Chime Networks people" James: "Okay. Thanks" >later< phone: *beeeeeep* *beep* *beep* *beeeeep* *beeeeeeeeeeeeep* *beepbeep* >smack< >reads phone< phone: "Jason, iiNet, need to disconnect <insert username here>" >thud< >dials up numbers< me: "Jason? Chris here. Got your fault." Jason: "Hi Chris. cool, can you do it?" me: "No. This needs to be lodged with Chime Networks or ITS. Chime Services does not deal with any of these systems." Jason: "But I got told to lodge it with Chime" me: "That's nice, but there's two Chime teams. Can you please make sure that it gets lodged with the correct team? Or even department? Jason: "Um, okay." me: "Good. Bye." >*thud*<
waaaaaaaaaah!
My boss read this and the one for today, and suggested that I go on a killing spree. To me, this isn't a good sign.